I have and do feel guilt. I know that I have said things or asked things that I now know were probably offensive, even though I didn't mean to be offensive at the time. I also feel guilt because one family of my ancestors in Virginia were slaveholders. My penitence for my family is to teach the truth. It is also to acknowledge my White privilege and how Black people, Native people, and other people of color do not share in those privileges. In the face of steamrollers, I am quiet and reserved. Finding a way into conversations has always been an issue for me anyway. When I am listening to people of color, I let them lead and listen to learn and to understand the best that I can. I am empathic and when someone is hurting I reach out, even if I cannot find the right words. A few years ago, when the subject of white fragility and white privilege arose, I would feel defensive. Today I accept the view that I am complicit. I'm not fragile today and I still have work to do on myself.
