Oh, I've certainly seen white exceptionalism, guilt, and shame in action and experienced them all to a degree. I don't think I've been driven by toxic white guilt, but I do think that I've seen examples of this on social media lately in a very overwhelming way. I think that white shame is justified and can motivate us to action in a necessary way. I was interested in the distinction in the video between being guilty and being complicit, and I think I've felt complicit before and that has motivated me not to be complicit moving forward. White guilt, in my experience, can motivate people into silence, but on the other hand, it can also motivate them into speaking up too much and crowding out voices of color. That balance can be the challenging piece of this.
I had a conversation with a friend that speaks to your point about social media posts. She was uncomfortable about social media posts--whether they were "performative" and whether they really could change the world. I was really moved to talk with her about her feelings of guilt and shame, and I think that we had a really productive conversation about how to take action instead of "performing the exceptional white person." But when we hung up the phone, I realized that the conversation we'd had wouldn't have been possible a few years ago because she'd always been uncomfortable talking about race--she felt like it wasn't her place. I'm grateful for the pointer toward Witnessing Whiteness. I've added it to the list of pieces I have to read.
I'm adding it to my list as well.
In my community, people have been driven by white guilt to bully others on Facebook into going to the protests even if they don't know what it's about and not speaking out about the looting and vandalism in the community. Section 2 had a quick mention of 'conformity bias' and it would have been nice to explore that further. Growing up in areas where everyone around me was either black or Mexican, I never knew what white guilt was, and now that I do, it feels like it cheapens the movement for equality into more of a conquest to attract social media followers of Facebook and Instagram.
These are definitely difficult issues that require time and opportuniites to behave differently. Ultimately, we can know, in our hearts, whether we are really changing or not. Honesty with self and honesty with others. As Dr. Pilgrim of the Jim Crow Museum said, "The triumph of dialogue..." This program is an enlightening place for awareness from which we can then move forward in more respectful and supportive ways.