I think I’m able to have a difficult and uncomfortable conversation about race. I appreciate the handouts as they give me specific things I can do starting immediately such as interrupting offensive jokes and educating myself about racism and human rights. I can speak up and say something when I see racism whether it’s one-on-one with a friend or coworker or in a community setting at work or school. One of the videos specifically made me shift my thinking in order to get more comfortable with race conversations. The speaker said that racism is not an all or nothing binary but it’s a spectrum. We are all imperfect humans and being a good person is a practice that needs to be done daily. That makes me feel like becoming anti-racist is not an insurmountable task that has to be done all at once. It makes it easier to take bites that I can handle and therefore become part of the solution.
I had a conversation this morning with a family member who was upset because the mural Black Austin Matters was painted in downtown Austin. She was upset that it didn't say All Lives Matter. Normally I wouldn't put up much of an argument but this morning I felt more empowered and could respond with a more educated response. They still felt the same way at the end of our conversation but I can hope that by chipping away at that thinking, they will eventually understand. I failed to mention that this was an elderly family member who says that they are colorblind. I told her that each color has a story behind it and that you have to open your mind to their story.
I look forward to using these new tools and be able to confront people when they spew hateful or non-informed conversations.
Great job. I feel more empowered and even compelled to have these conversations as well.
I really appreciated the last TED talk, where he talked about stories existing side by side, equally valid in terms of the oppression they speak to. It's not that one negates the other. That's such an important point. And so is the point that we can't just confront; we have to bring others along with us. We have to persuade, not just talk at people. To do that requires listening. And the listening has to be empathetic. What the TED speaker said about sharing and combining stories -- that's essentially empathy. I've been trying that, actually, this past week on social media, on subjects not related to race, but to other issues in the community. I've been trying to empathize and acknowledge how others think, and then shift things a bit, asking for assent or cooperation on a small or partial point, and not necessarily the whole thing. I'm trying to give a little, to see if that calms things a bit (cause things can get real heated on social media!), and it actually seems to be working! I'm still getting trolled of course. But I've also had a few people PM me to say thank you. So, I'm going to keep trying.
Yes, I also feel more comfortable to engage in conversation about racism. Yesterday, on fb, I saw a comment where somebody blamed race for the police not doing their work. She planted this race idea by saying police does not care about finding Latino women who went missing. Well, at the time the police was called out, it was to an accident where they could not find the car after it happened (it had ran through trees and lots of brush), and since they did not find the car , they did not know who was in it. Three days later they were reported missing, which proves the police did not know at the time of the accident, what race they were. I told this person it was not about race and for her to support anti-racism, she cannot make it a race issue when it is not. I was given a lot of support on my comment, but I would never be able to say something about it unless I got this personal, new view through education in these Modules. I feel more confident and less frightened to say my piece, or we could also say peace. 🙂
I appreciated the Ted talk re: beginning with stories that could bring people with opposing viewpoints closer together. While I still feel uncomfortable having these conversations with some, I look forward to using the tools to gently call out racist remarks and reminding others that it's a continuum that takes time to work through.
I appreciated the TED Talk by Jay Smooth on becoming more comfortable talking about race. It was both liberating and empowering to hear him say that "being mindful of our imperfections allows us to be good" to ourselves and to each other.
When talking about race, it will likely be uncomfortable and possibly messy. The intent of the heart is what is most important. Letting go of the need to be perfect takes the focus off ourselves and puts it back where it rightfully belongs -- on those who are victims of prejudice and racism.
In the words of Luvvie Ajayi, our goal should be "committing ourselves to speak truths in order to build bridges".
I appreciated Luvvie Ajayi's statement "People and systems count on our silence to keep us exactly where we are". I aspire to remember that when I am in a situation where I could speak up against racism...and overcome my white fragility in order to be a better anti-racist. She also had those three points she asks herself: did you mean it, can you defend it, did you say it with love? If yes, do it-tell the thoughtful truth.
The idea that becoming good at anti-racism is a continuum is liberating. Knowing that mistakes are expected is useful. I forget if it was here or another place where I saw a video that includes something about how to make right when you have done wrong. That is very helpful in this journey.
I am a mediator and trade in stories. I appreciated the talk about the power of stories, finding commonalities and being vulnerable to people you do not agree with. It is what we do all the time in mediation. However we have always been taught that we cannot mediate racist ideas. I still believe that, but perhaps we can mediate with people who hold those ideas and plant the seeds that may over time help the person to reconsider their world view.
I also really like the analogy of anti-racism being like hygiene - something that you work on every day, something that needs constant attention. The concept of dental hygiene, that sometimes you need others to help you to keep it up, and other times you will do what you have to alone is useful to me.
I will be putting some of those handouts up on the walls in my office, once we get back to offices. I have already sent one of the videos to a colleague who I think will appreciate the perspective. What I have to find more courage to do is send such videos to those who do not share some of the same perspective.
Catherine, I loved the thought of this work being like planting seeds.
We may not see the fruition of our efforts, but that does not negate the
importance of doing our part. I also liked the idea of looking at this as something that we need to practice and learn over time.
To me, the key is letting go of my need to do things perfectly. Our need for things to be perfect puts the focus on US, and that becomes an impediment
to any true change.
I loved the dental hygiene metaphor. It's imprinted in my mind. Now when I floss my teeth I will be assessing where I am on the ally continuum. I also realize how valuable it would be to have more opportunities to share stories with people who have different values from me. I realize that my emotional reactivity interferes with my ability to try to listen to stories and try to empathize.
I also really liked his metaphor of dental hygiene. As the audience and myself both laughed I realized it may be a great metaphor to use to help ease into these difficult conversations about race. I found myself pausing the different TED talk videos to jot down different quotes that struck me. I found the last TED talk by Tom Rietz interesting because he calls himself an 'unlikely activist' but I was really struck by his comment of taking your story, their story, and putting those stories together because we are all living side by side experiencing our different stories and in order to have discussions with others we need to see those connections. I will definitely be sharing these resources, PDFs and videos with my colleagues.
I have not written much if anything for Module 2 or Module 3. Module 2 knocked me out. I was not aware of many of the incidents in our history. I had been introduced to a few in the work I did in the 70's. To make it worse for me so much is happening today. I could not get over thinking about the children and families I have met and come to know over the years. I could barely think of the young children growing up in a world which does not accept them. A world where they may be beaten up, arrested for walking down the street, not rented an apartment or worse killed all because of the color of their skin. I cried for a few days then it was time to get up and do something.
I probably still do not have correct terminology or know enough history to make much of a change but I can start with people I know. Some of them are down right racist. Before I can do this I have to educate myself. Read more on history and government of this country and how different groups were and are treated. Start with facts. Most certainly mistakes will be made. I will own these. I don't want to learn at the expense of someone else. And I will never be an expert, so, there is no sense in waiting to study a library full of information. My social circle may even change. Might not be so bad.
Most of all, I think of the children. I want them to grow up differently than their parents and grandparents. What is my responsibility in making this happen? This requires action not sitting around reading a book all the time!
Thank you all for sharing in this very important topic.
I have been having conversations about race and racism for awhile as a teacher who moved from a school with almost no diversity to one with 43% English Language learners, I had to quickly brush up on the topic. But before, in my mostly white school we had to have the conversations as well. In the predominately white school the conversations were different. Mostly centered on how to acknowledge white privilege and how to be aware of it when in places. We had an incident at a zoo where the students where discriminated against for being from "public school" Tis was the first time a group of white student athletes had ever experienced any type of discrimination. It was a good place to talk about other types of discrimination and a place to check our privileges.
IN my new school with the larger diversity population, our conversations on race have changed. It is more about pride in our cultures, and experiences that they have experienced with racism from others including the institutional racism they have felt in the school system. These modules and videos have given me more avenues for conversations.
I enjoyed listening TED talks because I find the stories very interested. They help a lot, too. Replying to the question of feeling more prepared and confident to engage in conversations about race.. I'm not much sure, yet . However, I'm very confident when preparing topics like this to educate children in a witten form. I prepare lesson plans that can help little kids to reflect on all these topics about racism and inclusion. I'm sure this will help them to grow up with a more conscious choice for the kind of life they want for their future.