I am somewhere in between the awareness and active phase of the Ally continum. I am very conscious of the systemic racism in America and continue to educate myself about the forms of racism in this country. I am also reflecting on my white privilege and complacency when it comes to being an actual ally. I have a good foot or so in the active phase because of this training and I do try to hold conversations about the racism in this country and to share what I have learned in this training and in other reliable sources. I am open to what my friends of color share about their experiences at the hands of racism at work, in public etc. I want to be an advocate for anti-racism. I realize I need to watch my ego and keep in check, being anti-racist is not a race, it is a journey of unlearning, listening and relearning how to be a true ally to people of color and not let it become some personal heroic journey. The discussions of the White savior and toxic white guilt were very powerful and gave me pause to look at my true intentions when I start preaching or judging other white people for their white fragility and lack of understanding or interest in ending the systemic racism in this country. I also have white fragility, that is clear.
