I think I've shifted more and more from active towards advocate in recent years. I have paid attention to black voices saying please be quiet and support us without talking over us, and since then I've taken a backseat in many online conversations, using my energy to read posts and comments and to support with likes and shares and reducing how much I share of my own take on what has been said, because by and large it doesn't actually matter - the point is to raise up black voices. When I find myself writing "This is really good" or "Read this" or "Really powerful" or something, it has started to feel like who the hell am I to rate black voices against each other. I tend to avoid stating my opinion on them, because they just need to be heard, and if I shared it you already know I think it's worth sharing.
I was really saddened by the thousands of thumbs down and horrendously ignorant comments section of the TED talk. There is so much to do, and it's just so dark when I wander into that part of the internet. To think that people have lived and died and their children have lived and died and so much has not changed, it's hard to feel hopeful...yet, we live in a world of exponential growth and change, and it really feels like - as much as I hate the phrase - perhaps now's the time for the next big push. Not that it wasn't always required, but perhaps now more is possible than before. Perhaps we can ride this momentum somewhere impactful.
As I think about what long-term racial allyship looks like, I know I will continue to educate myself, to call out discrimination in different ways, to listen to marginalised groups and seek to amplify their voices. I'm also scared at the thought that we can rely on the police to intentionally tactically push for peaceful protests to turn into violent riots. I'm scared of putting myself in that danger, and I know we don't all have to seek change that way, but also feel like it's really important that we all stand together. That's the uncomfortable thought right now.