I've been working on understanding white privilege, implicit bias and structural or institutional racism for the last 15 years. I remember a diversity lunch and learn we had at work over a decade ago where we had to read an article about white privilege and then discuss it. We had a fairly diverse group in the room and I thought I was smart and countered every argument in the article. It wasn't until probably 2018 that I finally realized I had been working from the wrong definition the whole time. No wonder my co-worker told me I was brave for saying my thoughts on the subject. I cringe at what I must have sounded like. And now I hear the same arguments from people who are new to the topics of privilege and bias and racism. And I'm tired just having to explain it to people over the past few weeks. I can only imagine how tired POC are feeling.
I, too, have been reflecting on my mis-steps, and cringing at how I have responded, and/or not responding appropriately in my past. I am learning about different groups that don't have large representation in my community, and this is definitely opening up my understanding. I am with you in the exhaustion of having to explain this, over and over again. I'm hoping pointers will be given to help people WANT to hear this, and help them become quicker studies than I was.