Of course I've never thought about myself having a racial identity- understanding that and learning how it impacts my worldview and relations to others has been an awakening. Considering what I bring with me into a space, especially as a helping professional/campus professional when I am working with young women from racial and ethnic backgrounds different from my own, that's a constant self-check. And there's sometimes defensiveness internally- white feminism, white women's tears, white women help hold up white supremacy- and it gets me soul-searching and doubting myself and realizing I have the privilege to have the space to doubt myself...and knowing, yup, these things are true and I have to continually push myself to unlearn so much. When I learned about the concept of decolonization, I was like, I don't even think that would be possible for me. So, I have a couple of close white female friends that I can talk through these things with, so I can have my tears and whining shared with friends who can do the same for me so we can spare BIPOC friends and colleagues and students the chore.