Being white, I was saddened when the test showed a preference for lighter skin tone than darker skintone. That hurt; it is something I was not aware of, and considering that I don't particularly like the look of my own skin, I'd like to interrogate that and see where it's coming from. I don't have a lot of Black colleagues and friends; it's incredibly rare that I am in a small group with someone who doesn't look like me. However, I feel incredibly nervous in a large group of all white folks; I fear the discomfort when they start spouting about politics, guns, and ugly things that I associate with whites. So even though I have what I think is an affinity to mixed gatherings, it's not part of my practice, and I still harbor biases. But then, I was also surprised that I scored on the Race IAT as having association with whites as foreigners and as violent/dangerous; I imagine that it's due to the hostility from whites that I'm seeing today in the news. I am disgusted by my family and people who look like me who say and do horrible things against Black folks and immigrants; this is a battle I've fought for most of my life with my family, so maybe that came out in the test. As an ESL teacher, I may have more contact with other races than my family does, but that doesn't mean that I don't have biases. I do. I was surprised that they didn't come out more for Asians; I have a lot of students from China at the college, and they are always the students that have the biggest arguments over grades with me, and I assumed that this might come out as a deep bias against them. Yet, the test showed more of an association of Asian Americans with American and white Americans with foreign. I guess the most I can glean from this is that my own associations may be in flux. I felt stressed taking the tests. I absolutely hated having to lump Black folks with weapons (although it felt appropriate for white folks) and I hated the Foreign vs. American forced choice for Native Americans and Asians. It caused some anxiety; I didnt want to make those choices. The score bars at the end made me really sad to see the vast preferences of white associated with goodness, safety, Americanness, etc. I'm reminded of a time when I assigned a reading by Lawrence Otis Graham called "The Black Table is Still There." It's about a Black man who comes back to his high school as an adult and goes into the cafeteria and finds that the Black table, at which he refused to sit as a high school kid who told himself that he needed to integrate into white groups, was still in the cafeteria. In assigning the essay to my students, we had a discussion about whether it was OK that the table was still there, or whether it was a sign of little progress in race relations and was actually more problematic for race relations. My students (ESL, from 17 different nations) overwhelmingly said that it was OK and perfectly appropriate for students to be drawn to people who look like them and want to be with them. I didn't want them to draw that conclusion; I think I have a very kumbaya kind of view of the world that isn't very realistic, and I wanted them to believe that we're better when we're diversified. Maybe they believe that too, and maybe they just show an appreciation for affinity. Or maybe their own racism drives that belief. All of this makes me realize just how much more I have to learn about race and race relations.